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Rants & Raves Index
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Guest Editorial - Scooter Trash
Big Suckers & Vinegar

Hey there friends, I’m back for some more questionable advice, bad humor, and heartfelt warm fuzzies. I hope you all had a good Christmas, and that the new year is shaping up to be a dandy. I kind of missed the whole thing. Putting in too many damn hours at too many damn jobs! But it was good for me anyway. I spent Christmas day with my feet up, the tube on, and my eyes closed for the most part,,,,PERFECT!

Now I gotta say I’m just about belly full of this cold weather shit!! I got some new goodies for my sled I’ll tell ya about in a minute, and itching to give em a spin, but can’t seem to get rid of the snow and ice around my place to even get on the damn street. Man, I feel like I moved to Buffalo, or something, not that there’s anything wrong with Buffalo, it’s just that here at home we’re sposed to get this great amount of sunshine, and warm weather…Oh well, we’ve had some pretty mild winters for the last few years, I guess it’s our turn. At least we aint getting floods, 10ft snow storms, or, God forbid Tsunamis,,,we are so fortunate,,,don’t forget that one.

I got some good stuff to tell ya about that might help ya get through the winter doldrums. If you happen to be riding a Twin Cam of some description, and you hate that damn football air cleaner even half as much as I do, I got a great solution. Arlen Ness has a custom air cleaner backing plate/filter set up that’s just tits. It’s not only cheaper than the same thing H-D tries to sell ya, it’s cleaner by miles, and has half the parts.

I don’t usually like the shit Ness puts out, too glitzy, and way too damn expensive, but this little gem is well worth the $100 scoots or so it’ll cost ya, and you can put whatever kind of round air cleaner cover ya want on it. It’s called a “Big Sucker”, no shit, and there’s two models, so make sure you order the one for your application. The filter elements are a bit different too, so pay attention to that . No spacers, or cross over tubes, or little breather goodies to mess with, it literally bolts on to your heads, and you’re in business.

Keep in mind you might have to re-jet your carb if you’re running a carburetor, cause you’ll be getting more air through this beauty, and you'll probably have to fatten it up just a bit. You can get this jewel from just about any catalog order joint. Custom Chrome, Jims, or, God forbid, J&P,,,(there’s a story behind that one too).

I also want to recommend the pipes/mufflers made by Cycle Shack. GREAT product, well made, and even though they have literally doubled in price since I bought the last set I used back in ’92, they’re still a pretty good value for your buck. I can attest to the toughness of their pipes, and how well they hold up, not to mention they are the sweetest sounding after market pipes going. Deep, throaty, and enough volume to wake up even the most unconscious cagers out there. Remember “Loud Pipes Save Lives “. Also the chrome will knock your socks off, looks like show chrome from Brown’s. Oh yeah, don’t forget to get a jar of “Chrome Guard” also by Cycle Shack, mix it up per instructions, (which are a hoot all by themselves), and dump some of this goop in your new pipes. It won’t prevent bluing forever, but it will sure slow it down, and when they do get blue, it looks a lot nicer, no spotting or any of that shit. Make sure the stuff is dry,,,at least over night before you put em in service.

One other thing, before you fire your motor behind these new pipes, take a minute, and wipe em down with a soft cloth and some vinegar. If you fire em up without doing that your muggy, greasy fingerprints will be all over em in indelible blue chrome,,,really. Not too much more on the tech end this month, those two items ought to work pretty well for you. Any questions, feel free to mail me, and ask, I don’t know it all, but I can usually find out what’s going on for ya. I’m going to a big swap meet the end of Jan, and will have a report on anything new I run into there, I hope to find a nice cobra seat for my softail, gonna change the old girl a bit. Do what ya can’t do with the ole lady, make ‘er more comfortable, and user friendly.

Also in the market for some one piece drag bars, you know, the fat ones with about a 6” rise. We’ll see, I sure aint up for paying upwards of $200 for the damn things,,,either one, bars or seat. (not cheap, just poor) Sure is amazing how this fun little thing I got into so long ago has gone from a great way of life that a poor man could enjoy, to a worldwide ultra-mega market that commands millions of dollars annually even from small local business guys. Example the Guys in New York. I remember when if you put $2500 into a chopper you went all out. Shit, can’t get a frame for that today it seems. And the guys that remember those days seem to be in the shadows just watching it all unfold before us.

Hey, can’t let this one get by without saying a word in Remembrance, Tribute, and Honor to two of the true Icons of our world. First of all, I don’t think any of us will ever forget the Great Dave Mann. Nobody has ever chronicled our lifestyle with such accuracy, vividness, and true to life form as this wonderful Artist. There isn’t one of our number that, given the opportunity to look through his paintings, couldn’t find at least one that depicted his life perfectly, and probably a lot more. He will be Sorely Missed by all.

Second, the passing of the Great builder Indian Larry was a shock that I’m sure was felt around the world among bikers young, and old alike. He represented the lifestyle as it truly was/is/and ultimately will be. There are many “Bike Builders” around today, and each has a particular area of expertise that lends it’s own flavor to their bikes. I take nothing away from any of them, for instance, the Tuetles are great metal fabricators, as is Billy Lane, Dave Perowitz is a wizard with a paint gun, etc. but Larry had it all. He BUILT his bikes. The motors came off of his bench, not out of a crate, his frames came from his torch, his Transmissions came from his bench as well. He truly gave life to his bikes all the way around, and is due the highest of accolades, and the Greatest of Respect from all of us the world over, that even pretend to hold a wrench in our gnarled, perpetually greasy hands.

You two Wonderful men from our life will be missed forever, and NEVER forgotten. And I say THANK YOU to you Both. So with that, I’m gonna put my tired feet up, toss another stick in the stove, turn up the music, and take a nap, hopefully till better weather frees us to, once again, do that thing we have all been preparing for. I’ll catch ya again soon.

Scooter P. Trash

A note from Warren:
Good stuff from our good buddy Trashman. I can vouch for the air cleaner deal - I dunno what HD was thinking when they put a football on the side of their pretty engines - but for every sickness, there's a cure. My only question about the vinegar is - don't it make your pipes STINKY????

More later,