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Rants & Raves Index
The opinions expressed in this editorial are 100% my own. If you don't like ' your own damn website and tell everyone I'm a jerk. If I'm violating any trademark or copyright stuff, just email me here and I'll make it right.
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Dump that chopper...
Warren Puckers Up for V-Rod!

After years of publishing I've decided it's time for a change. Let's face facts, folks - choppers are dangerous, unstable, cranky dinosaurs that should be outlawed.

I know what yer thinkin'..."Warren, you said CHOPPERSRULE...what's up with this". Look, if people had been meant to customize motorcycles, they would come from the factory customized - and really, what's all this nonsense about individuality and personal freedom? Wouldn't it really be better if all the bikes we rode were exactly the same? That way there would be only one dealer and he could take care of all the problems for us!

No more nights in a greasy garage, no more scouring Ebay for deals on parts and no more time spent fabricating that "special" bracket. Just endless riding down to the dealer to get our oil changed on identical bikes!

And what better bike for everyone to ride the the, V-Rod. Looks like a cool chrome sportbike and was designed by Italians! You can't really wrench on it because nothing that was made by Harley for the last 50 years fits it, it's water cooled and it's frame looks like a drunk plumbers nightmare.

So that's the news! I'm selling my chopper (and all the cardboard boxes fulla parts in the garage) and buying me a factory-fresh V-Rod. From now on it's sippin' cappuccinos at the dealer while they check the air pressure in my tires as I peruse the latest "motor fashions". I suggest all loyal readers of (soon to be renamed sell your choppers and a least take a look at the sleek, sportbike known as the V-Rod. I know you'll fall in love like I did.

Oh - one more thing: April Fool!